Dear future Lauren,
I know you REALLY want to make breastfeeding work. That is awesome! So now its about time to go back to working nights, and you are a little worried. What if it doesn't work out now? Will working nights ruin all your hard work you put into breast feeding? What if *gasp* you have to use formula now. Well here's the thing self, its ok. Since I am in my right, non-hormonal, stressed about going back to work mind...I'll point you in the right direction so you will succeed. Not succeed in breast feeding, but succeed in realizing that whatever happens it.will.be.fine. and more importantly- God is still on his throne. So thank your best friend Katie for sending you some true things to think about..and here they are:
Feelings: I will bond more with this babe if I breastfeed, I will save our family money, it will be more convenient, I want to experience what I "missed out on" with Inara.
Truth: BF does not necessarily affect our long term relationship, my identity in Christ is what will impact and draw him; Justin (who is the leader of your home) is not concerned about our finances; it may not always be convenient (dates, trips away, nighttime feedings, others inability to help); resting in the work CHRIST has done in me to persevere, have a level head, and stay strong is where I should rest and praise, for I can do nothing apart from Christ.
Feelings: I worry I will still be disappointed in I am unable to make BF work for our family
Truth: I may be disappointed (and that is ok) but I should not be devastated. I did not have a child so that I could BF him. I am blessed with a baby>child>person who belongs to God and His will is best for all of us. HOW I feed my child is so unimportant in the overall picture of their life. HOW I feed my child does not define any spiritual or moral aspect of me. It does not serve to build me up or tear me down in any way. I am defined in Christ. God does not call me to breastfeed but to raise up His child to know Him.
Oh Lord, help me to maintain a perspective on breastfeeding that honors you. Help me to not make it anything more than it is-merely a way to feed our child. Remind me of the insignificant eternal benefits of breastfeeding. Help me to remember I serve you first, not myself, my abilities or achievements. Help me to be content and even excited that Your will is best and it will be done regardless of how much I fight it. Change my heart, change my thinking to see this struggle through Your truth. Help me to persevere in breastfeeding and keep me acutely aware that if I succeed, You and You alone are worthy of praise. Help me to see Your power in my weakness. Use this Lord to draw me closer to you and to trust in your perfect plan, even if it is not what I want. Amen.
Showing posts with label Future Lauren. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Future Lauren. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Monday, September 10, 2012
Potty training
This part is more for future reference when potty training kiddo #2...
We tried potty training Inara in April. She could hold it for a really long time, but was not interested in all at peeing in the potty. We rewarded her with 1 M&M for being dry and then another M&M if she peed in the potty....but she didn't care about peeing in her potty because she already got a reward. We finally stopped after 2 days when she told us she ONLY wanted to pee in her diapers and NOT in her potty. So we figured we would wait a few months and try again.
Finally last week I had been scheduled with 9 days off...let potty training begin. This time we tried to amp up the bribes to make it seem more appealing. So I headed to Party City and loaded up on little cheap prizes like tattoos, jewelry, Dora, Hello Kitty, and Yo Gabba Gabba favors. This time if she stayed dry she would get 1 M&M and if she peed on her potty she would get a prize...this is how its going.
Day 1- She peed 3 times on the potty and no real accidents. If she started to pee, she would stop and then be able to finish on the potty. She got SOO excited and would yell "I'm doing it!"
Day 2- Pretty much a repeat of Day 1
Day 3- This day was hard because she had to poop. Inara has GI issues, so I was wondering how this would go. She had accidents throughout the day. She would pee a little in the potty and even sat trying to poop for over 30 minutes. But she couldn't go. I finally decided that her pooping was more important than potty training. I told her I was putting on a diaper so she could poop, but as soon as she pooped we would put back on undies. She pooped with in 10 minutes and stayed dry after that.
Day 4- We had previously planned to spend the day at Coney Island. We weren't sure what to do, but figured we would be outside all day so if she did have accidents it wouldn't be a huge deal. We put her in in a pull up and she held her pee for 4.5 hours! Finally she said she was going to pee. I told her to hold it and I ran to the bathroom. She held it, but then cried in the bathroom and said she couldn't pee because "its too dirty mom, i can't do it here"! In her defense it WAS nasty, I didn't pee all day because of the same reason :) so I just told her to go in her pull up and that it was ok to do that this time. Then later on, she peed on my leg at the pool :) but once we got home she stayed dry and peed in the potty again.
Day 5- Dry and didn't pee at church. 1 accident at home and 2 successful pees in her potty. This time I could tell she was actually making herself go instead of waiting until she was all the way full of pee.
Day 6-My friend told me about these
cool juice drinks that are organic and low sugar. So I pumped her full of pink lemonade all day long :) She had 1 accident in the morning. It was more frustrating to me because I walked away for like 5 minutes to email some friends and that's when she peed. It just seemed like I have to be constantly watching her for her little potty dance right now. But she also peed 8x in her potty that day. And we also bought a potty seat to help with her fear of big toilets and she did good with the potty seat. I also stopped prompting her with rewards. I rewarded her if she asked (which she always did), but I didn't bring it up to motivate her. It actually felt like she was finally getting the hang of it.
Day 7- I decided to make an adventure out of the house. It was a nice day and I was being tired of cooped up in the house all day, so we went to the zoo. I had her try to pee in the potty before we left (no luck), put her in a pull-up for the ride there (stayed dry), and had her try to pee in our little portable potty chair (no luck). So I put on undies for the actual time at the zoo. We stopped at 1 bathroom so I could pee and she tried but didn't go. I was REALLY proud of her for even trying because she does NOT like public bathrooms :) We made it back to the car without any accidents, tried again in our little potty (no luck), put on a pull up (she stayed dry the whole ride home!), and when we got home she peed in the potty! I was super proud of her, she held her pee for over 4 hours!
Day 8 was pretty much the same as 7. The only difference was that when she would ask for her prize after peeing on the potty I would remind her that soon she would get ALL her prizes and then should woudn't be potty training any more, she would be all done and potty TRAINED. I tried to hype it up so it didn't seem like I was just taking away her prizes :)
Day 9- I think its safe to say I have a potty trained kiddo? She still wears diapers at nap/bedtime, but has been doing really good! Today she got her last prize...and I tried to save the best for last. I made a BIG deal out of how she was offically a big girl and not a little kiddo anymore :) It seemed to work, but the first time she peed and I didn't have a prize for her, she was a little mad. So I told her she could have an M &M after she peed until they were all gone. That seemed to help and the next time she didn't even ask for anything :)
2 weeks later and she is still doing good! We haven't had any accidents in almost a week and she is learning how to use public bathrooms! YAY for saving money on less diapers :)
So advice to future me when potty training kiddo #2...it likely won't happen in a few days. Yes, there are a few people whose kids are potty trained in 3 days, but planning on that is setting yourself up and ultimately your kiddo for disappointment.
We tried potty training Inara in April. She could hold it for a really long time, but was not interested in all at peeing in the potty. We rewarded her with 1 M&M for being dry and then another M&M if she peed in the potty....but she didn't care about peeing in her potty because she already got a reward. We finally stopped after 2 days when she told us she ONLY wanted to pee in her diapers and NOT in her potty. So we figured we would wait a few months and try again.
Finally last week I had been scheduled with 9 days off...let potty training begin. This time we tried to amp up the bribes to make it seem more appealing. So I headed to Party City and loaded up on little cheap prizes like tattoos, jewelry, Dora, Hello Kitty, and Yo Gabba Gabba favors. This time if she stayed dry she would get 1 M&M and if she peed on her potty she would get a prize...this is how its going.
Day 1- She peed 3 times on the potty and no real accidents. If she started to pee, she would stop and then be able to finish on the potty. She got SOO excited and would yell "I'm doing it!"
 |
| Getting ready for Day 1 |
 |
| Big One had to potty train with us too! :) |
Day 2- Pretty much a repeat of Day 1
Day 3- This day was hard because she had to poop. Inara has GI issues, so I was wondering how this would go. She had accidents throughout the day. She would pee a little in the potty and even sat trying to poop for over 30 minutes. But she couldn't go. I finally decided that her pooping was more important than potty training. I told her I was putting on a diaper so she could poop, but as soon as she pooped we would put back on undies. She pooped with in 10 minutes and stayed dry after that.
 |
| Putting on some bracelets she got as a reward for going |
Day 4- We had previously planned to spend the day at Coney Island. We weren't sure what to do, but figured we would be outside all day so if she did have accidents it wouldn't be a huge deal. We put her in in a pull up and she held her pee for 4.5 hours! Finally she said she was going to pee. I told her to hold it and I ran to the bathroom. She held it, but then cried in the bathroom and said she couldn't pee because "its too dirty mom, i can't do it here"! In her defense it WAS nasty, I didn't pee all day because of the same reason :) so I just told her to go in her pull up and that it was ok to do that this time. Then later on, she peed on my leg at the pool :) but once we got home she stayed dry and peed in the potty again.
Day 5- Dry and didn't pee at church. 1 accident at home and 2 successful pees in her potty. This time I could tell she was actually making herself go instead of waiting until she was all the way full of pee.
Day 6-My friend told me about these
cool juice drinks that are organic and low sugar. So I pumped her full of pink lemonade all day long :) She had 1 accident in the morning. It was more frustrating to me because I walked away for like 5 minutes to email some friends and that's when she peed. It just seemed like I have to be constantly watching her for her little potty dance right now. But she also peed 8x in her potty that day. And we also bought a potty seat to help with her fear of big toilets and she did good with the potty seat. I also stopped prompting her with rewards. I rewarded her if she asked (which she always did), but I didn't bring it up to motivate her. It actually felt like she was finally getting the hang of it. |
| Sooo excited for her sparkly Hello Kitty tattoo! |
Day 7- I decided to make an adventure out of the house. It was a nice day and I was being tired of cooped up in the house all day, so we went to the zoo. I had her try to pee in the potty before we left (no luck), put her in a pull-up for the ride there (stayed dry), and had her try to pee in our little portable potty chair (no luck). So I put on undies for the actual time at the zoo. We stopped at 1 bathroom so I could pee and she tried but didn't go. I was REALLY proud of her for even trying because she does NOT like public bathrooms :) We made it back to the car without any accidents, tried again in our little potty (no luck), put on a pull up (she stayed dry the whole ride home!), and when we got home she peed in the potty! I was super proud of her, she held her pee for over 4 hours!
Day 8 was pretty much the same as 7. The only difference was that when she would ask for her prize after peeing on the potty I would remind her that soon she would get ALL her prizes and then should woudn't be potty training any more, she would be all done and potty TRAINED. I tried to hype it up so it didn't seem like I was just taking away her prizes :)
Day 9- I think its safe to say I have a potty trained kiddo? She still wears diapers at nap/bedtime, but has been doing really good! Today she got her last prize...and I tried to save the best for last. I made a BIG deal out of how she was offically a big girl and not a little kiddo anymore :) It seemed to work, but the first time she peed and I didn't have a prize for her, she was a little mad. So I told her she could have an M &M after she peed until they were all gone. That seemed to help and the next time she didn't even ask for anything :)
2 weeks later and she is still doing good! We haven't had any accidents in almost a week and she is learning how to use public bathrooms! YAY for saving money on less diapers :)
So advice to future me when potty training kiddo #2...it likely won't happen in a few days. Yes, there are a few people whose kids are potty trained in 3 days, but planning on that is setting yourself up and ultimately your kiddo for disappointment.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
For future me
Dear hormonal Lauren,
Let me first start by saying...it is OK. Now I know you, so don't go roll your eyes and say "yeah but...". Just know that it is really going to be ok. I can say that right now because I am in my right mind and know that once this baby comes you will likely not be. You will be sad for another c-section, or a baby that won't latch on, or the noise of that awful pump.
But God! He is so big and so strong, and His arms are open wide. Run to him in your emotional and foggy minded state. He understands like no one else does. He made you Lauren and believe it or not, he knew whatever is happening right now would happen...in fact he willed it would be so.
When you feel guilty or like you are being a bad mom for giving this new baby formula...just stop and don't feel that way. I know it seems easier said that done. But remember, Inara had formula and she turned out just fine! The purpose of pregnancy is not...I repeat NOT to have a natural childbirth, with a baby that latches right away, who is perfectly healthy and nurses wonderfully for at least a year. Ideal..maybe but not the purpose of pregnancy.
And while we are at it, I am going to say something that might make you cry, but it is true and you may need to hear it...You do not deserve to have a perfect pregnancy/childbirth/labor/parenting experience. *Take a break to think about that* Are you ready for more? Ok, so you don't deserve it, but guess what? God gives us so much better things that we don't deserve! You get to go to Heaven when you die or He comes back. He has given you the Holy Spirit to guide, convict, and teach you about his love and your sin. He has given you the most glorious and inexpressible joy in His Son Jesus! I promise you those are far better than your image of "perfect experience".
Cling to God's word when you feel lost. You did it here and here. You came out on the other side and were OK. No you were more than ok, you had JOY. Joy that I assure you does NOT come from your plan, but from submitting to God's perfect and sanctifying plan. Trust Him. He will not fail you.
Let me first start by saying...it is OK. Now I know you, so don't go roll your eyes and say "yeah but...". Just know that it is really going to be ok. I can say that right now because I am in my right mind and know that once this baby comes you will likely not be. You will be sad for another c-section, or a baby that won't latch on, or the noise of that awful pump.
But God! He is so big and so strong, and His arms are open wide. Run to him in your emotional and foggy minded state. He understands like no one else does. He made you Lauren and believe it or not, he knew whatever is happening right now would happen...in fact he willed it would be so.
When you feel guilty or like you are being a bad mom for giving this new baby formula...just stop and don't feel that way. I know it seems easier said that done. But remember, Inara had formula and she turned out just fine! The purpose of pregnancy is not...I repeat NOT to have a natural childbirth, with a baby that latches right away, who is perfectly healthy and nurses wonderfully for at least a year. Ideal..maybe but not the purpose of pregnancy.
And while we are at it, I am going to say something that might make you cry, but it is true and you may need to hear it...You do not deserve to have a perfect pregnancy/childbirth/labor/parenting experience. *Take a break to think about that* Are you ready for more? Ok, so you don't deserve it, but guess what? God gives us so much better things that we don't deserve! You get to go to Heaven when you die or He comes back. He has given you the Holy Spirit to guide, convict, and teach you about his love and your sin. He has given you the most glorious and inexpressible joy in His Son Jesus! I promise you those are far better than your image of "perfect experience".
Cling to God's word when you feel lost. You did it here and here. You came out on the other side and were OK. No you were more than ok, you had JOY. Joy that I assure you does NOT come from your plan, but from submitting to God's perfect and sanctifying plan. Trust Him. He will not fail you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
