Monday, June 16, 2014

My toddler boy

Gosh, that can't be true? Some how, some way.....I have a toddler. Here's my 15 month update (2 months late) on our little dude. Because sorry, you're the second child and well child checks are never on time. Seriously, if I had more than 2, they'd NEVER get to the doctor!

Weight: *Mom fail, I threw away the paper with his information on it
Length: *I am basically a rockstar  :)
Favorite moments:hearing him laugh and giggle with Inara, getting big open mouth sloppy kisses
Least favorite moments: Him waking up tired and grumpy with the sun
Milestones: Started walking around 14 months, signs more, help, please, and eat. Climbs everything. New words every day.
Likes: being outside, cars, dogs, Inara, Pawpaw, EATING
Dislikes: Getting snack catcher taken away, being told no

This little guy is such a dude.  He LOVES cars and trucks. Each time he sees one, he says "vroom, vroom".  And when we get to watch the garbage truck, its the best thing ever.  He can find a ball from a mile away, and NEVER stops eating.  He is sweet and will gives kisses, but oh my! This kiddo has a temper. He has recently been hitting when I say "no". Which is kind of a lot because he's a crazy boy who want to scale everything in my house. He follows Inara around like he is her shadow, and gets SO sad when she wants to play by her self in her room. When she is gone, however, he is a different kid. He is much more calm and playful, and actually acts like a toddler.  He just is frustrated all the time when they are together because he loves her so much, and just wants to be with her. It really is super sweet.  

I mean, look at this kid?  He hopped up on the couch, grabbed the ipad and was swiping away :)

See? He climbs EVERYTHING! We are in trouble! But look at his cute face :)

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Being Depressed

Well if that isn't the most exciting title, I don't know what is?!  Just kidding. I've been away from my blog for a while. 1) Its really hard to keep up with these days. Who knew having a second kid would add so much more work. 2) I feel like I've not had really anything great to write. Then tonight Justin encouraged me to blog about how I've been depressed lately.  So I'm submitting to him, and here we are.

Anyways, about a month ago, something changed. It wasn't a specific thing that happened, but I noticed all the joy in my life was gone.  I wanted to sleep all day, I wasn't eating, and I wanted to sleep some more. I've always wanted to stay home with my kids, but found my self longing for work days, counting down the hours until Justin would be home with me, and looking for ways to leave the house. I didn't want to do anything. Go out. See people. Cook. Eat. Clean. All I wanted was sleep.

One day I was in the kitchen and just burst into tears because I had to do the dishes.  Seriously folks, I'm a pretty stellar human being :)  I found my self CRYING OVER THE DISHES.  I thought, that surely there was something more important, more Godly, with more eternal significance, than doing dishes, changing diapers, cooking food.  I would think about my day at work, how I SAW what I did, and how it mattered. I could see how bringing coffee to a tired mom, made a difference.  How praying for a friend and sending an encouraging text meant something. But, this? Snotty noses, dirty counters, and laundry? What was I doing? Did it matter? Add some "mommy guilt" and I was feeling top notch.  

I thought, "Oh my gosh. Why am I thinking these things? Something is wrong, this isn't me. I love my kids and being at home." And I was right. Something was wrong, but that IS me. That IS who I am without Christ. Depressed. Unmotivated. Angry. Impatient. Unkind. Unloving. Selfish. I was being me. I was ignoring my Savior. And without the love of Christ overflowing in me. There is nothing good in my heart. I'll say it again, because its true. There is nothing good in me. Everything that is good and loving and kind and sweet, is from the Lord. So when I lose sight of who He is, and what He's done for heart is cold and dark and lonely.

By God's grace I confessed my sin, was forgiven, repented and started just doing the next thing.  There still wasn't joy, but I was getting up and moving. Going outside with the kids. Cleaning the 10 cup of the day (Seriously, how do 2 tiny humans use so many cups?!). Meal planning. Reading a book. Playing and interacting.

And you know what else? Without Christ as my focus, life IS depressing. Without working for him, doing the dishes AGAIN is infuriating and insulting. Honoring Christ MUST be my focus, because Shepherd's never going to say "Wow, mom. I'm sorry I smacked you 5 times before 10am today. You look like you need a rest. Go have a nap". When my focus is on the things of this world, my outlook is bleak. BUT, when (by God's grace) I can see past the snot, to the tiny hurting heart that needs a Savior just as much as I do, that is where the work and joy is. Doing the dishes all day long, because I'm loving "the least of these" and therefor loving Jesus.

My sweet, sweet friend Katie gave me these two small prints that fit perfectly by my sink, which is where I spend a lot of my day. It was (and still is) a great reminder that my work matters.  It matters because its been given to me from a loving, perfect, and holy God.

I'd love to say that it's all rainbows and unicorns over here. But I'm still fighting. But. I'm fighting.  I'm choosing to trust God with what he's given me and to obey his calling on my life. It has gotten better. Last week the kids were sick and I was so sad I had to go to work.  But then I was happy, that I was sad. Because that meant I wanted to be home. That meant God was working in my heart.

Playing with the kids has actually been fun, instead of a chore. Wrestling when I'm sleepy didn't make me angry yesterday, it gave me energy. God is good. Being a Mom, is by far the most selfless and hardest thing I've ever, ever, EVER done. But it's also showed me so much about my dark, dirty, heart, and the sweet loving, tenderness of my Savior and my Heavenly Dad. 

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Stitch Fix #2

So remember when I got my first Stitch Fix back in January. Well, I've been saving up my money and this week, I got my second fix! I seriously was so excited to get my box, that when I was notified that it shipped, I kind of cheated! I googled the names of each item they sent me, so I could get a sneak peek!  I know I'm the worst and should have waited, but I was just too excited. I was relieved that it wasn't love at first sight with everything in my box, since I only had enough money saved up for a few items.

So what is Stitch Fix anyway? Well I'm glad you ask. Even though this was my second box and I'll likely get them only a few times a year, I LOVE IT! Stitch Fix is like having your own personal stylist, here's how it works

Create your style profile  
Fill out a pretty extensive questionnaire about your style.
You can even link it up to a specific Pinterest board.
Get five hand picked items
You can even specify what you want/don't want. (No jewelry, only dresses, etc)
Keep what you like and send back the rest
Try on the items in the comfort of your own home.
Send back items in bag with pre-paid shipping.
Comes with styling tips
Each piece comes with styling tips,
how to dress it up or dress it down
Ok, so how much does this cost?
$20 Styling fee
Use this towards the cost of your final order
Get 25% off
If you keep all 5 items, they give you 25% off your purchase
Average price
They state on their average price per items is $65, 
that being said 3 of my items were under $60.

I honestly was so excited to get a personalized note from my stylist!

So are you guys ready to see the contents of my second fix?

This black lace detailed blouse was $38. I thought it was cute and different from what I normally wear
However, it just didn't fit right. It was a tad too big, so I needed to wear a cami under it, and that
just made it look weird. I sent this back.

 Each piece gets a style card with it. Something to dress it up and dress it down.
So fun!

These "Just Black" jeans were $78 and the same brand as the jeans I was sent last time.
They were super comfortable and were the correct size in all the right spots.
They seemed a little too "skinny" for me, but they have a little stretch to them.
Even after trying them on a few times, they stretched a bit. So I kept them!

Here are 2 items together.  This Kut from Kloth jean jacket was $78, and the blue maxi dress was $58.
I already had a jean jacket so I sent that back.  I liked the skirt, but something about the way it was hemmed
made my hips appear even wider that they are.  Plus as a few people mentioned, I could get a maxi skirt for
half the price at Target.  Both sent back.

Here's another picture of the maxi skirt. Also, check how high I had to hike that thing up,
so it didn't drag the ground for like 3 inches.

Last item was this green button up sleeveless blouse for $54. 
I sent this back too.  It was too big and just hung on my body. It was very soft
and would be great for the summer, but not the right size/fit.

So there you have it! Even though I only kept the jeans, I am super happy with this fix! I am glad I didn't love all the pieces, because I can't afford to love them all! But buying a staple item here or there seems doable. Plus the jeans I bought were made in the USA, so that makes me feel better about paying a higher price for them. In fact, 3 of the 5 items were made in the US. And I never would have thought I could wear a sleeveless blouse, but Stitch Fix made me try it! And now when/if I'm out and about shopping around, I'll be more adventurous. And that is really why I love Stitch Fix. I get to try on things in the comfort of my own home, with other clothes that I own, and see what works and doesn't work. It's been good to be pushed out of my comfort zone just a little! I already scheduled my next fix for the middle of August. I am going to a wedding in September, and I always rush out the weekend before to try to find something to wear. I am super excited to be sent a bunch of dresses to try! I mean, how fun is that?

So have you tried Stitch Fix yet? Did you love it? Did you hate it? If you haven't tried it out, I would love for you to sign up through my link! I get a $25 credit when your first box ships. Thanks!

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

I'm having a Spring Party!

*Whoops! I had this one written and ready to go, but forgot to hit publish! So its a little late :)

The past 2 years we've had a Spring Party on the first day (or weekend) of Spring. (You can see the old posts here and here). I got the idea from one of my favorite Mommy bloggers, OhAmanda.

Just like with Christmas, I didn't want the real meaning of Easter to be over shadowed by traditional holiday stuff. But at the same time I didn't want to throw the baby out with the bath water. So we celebrate Spring by dyeing eggs, hiding baskets, and doing a fun craft. Normally I invite my parents over and a few friends to join in on the fun.  But this year, Justin's work schedule is crazy, so we did it mid-week.  It was smaller, but it was still special and fun!

After I wrote this post for The Healthy Hen about our Easter candy, I decided to change their Easter treats. I filled the plastic eggs with other treats.  I put pennies in some of them (because ANY coin is exciting to Inara at this age).  I bought some of Annie's Bunny Grahms, and some of these yummy caramelized walnuts.  I put tattoos, stickers, and a cheap craft.

Inara and her bestie taking turns dyeing the eggs
I let the boys hang out too, but they were too busy stealing each others food
Sorting through their loot, after finding their baskets and eggs

Guys, I can't even handle how cute they are together!

Love this man!
It was fun because Inara woke up and was so excited for her Spring party!  And it's been really great because she's been asking about when we get to do stuff for Easter.  I'm going to start my Sense of the Resurrection activities next week, and I can't wait.  I'm hoping having this party separate from our Easter celebration, keeps the fun secular things we do, but allows Christ's death, burial, and resurrection to shine even brighter on Easter Sunday!

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Oh, hey there!

Wow, it's been nearly 2 months since blogged last. I do t think I've ever gone that long. And not that y'all are waiting for me to blog, but I like to have these little accounts of our lives for me, too. But life is busy. Even now I'm typing this on my phone. I rarely get on the computer. Without my iPhone, I'd never check my mail, read a book, have a meal plan, or even know the day of the week! Really Instagram is taking over my blog. It's a love hate relationship!

But here I am with nothing to say except I have a million things I want to say and about 5 half written blog posts. But it always seems there is more pressing things to do. But this little space is important to me, so I do want it to keep going. Hopefully I'll have time to write about what I'm learning, what I still NEED to learn, what I'm reading, my trip to Las Vegas, our Spring party, and why it's hard for me to be a Mom. Like I said, I have a lot to say, and not a lot of time to write. But I'll be back. Hopefully this week! 
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