Great is Your Faithfulness: Birthday Boy

Last week the Lord gave me such a sweet moment with Shepherd. He seemed kind of sleepy and Inara was out of the house, so I thought I would just enjoy a little rocking chair time with him. He fell asleep almost instantly. It was so amazing. Worship music was playing in the living room and I was holding my baby. I was silent crying nearly the whole time. I couldn't believe that nearly a whole year had passed. I couldn't believe that we weren't planning on having another baby, but he fits perfectly in our family. It was a sweet time to pray for him and Inara and for God to work mightily in their lives. I was overwhelmed with dreams for them both.

It was fun to think back on the crazy few weeks before Shepherd was due. SO MANY TRIAGE VISITS. One visit I was even told that I would be having my baby that day, only to be informed it was an allergic reaction not Cholestasis. I remember the excitement and then disappointment of that day. I am glad I didn't have a c-section, but was blessed with the most beautiful (and fast) VBAC. The love that instantly couldn't be contained, is one I'll never forget.

I remember the first few years after Inara was born, I would think back to her delivery. I would remember all the hard and awful things, and praise God for being there with me through it all.

The thought of my suffering and homelessness

is bitter beyond words.[a]

I will never forget this awful time,

as I grieve over my loss.

Yet I still dare to hope

when I remember this:

The faithful love of the Lord never ends![b]

His mercies never cease.

Great is his faithfulness;

his mercies begin afresh each morning.

I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance;

therefore, I will hope in him!”

Lamentations 3:19-24

That's also why I like to think about Shepherd's delivery. My surprise baby. My miracle baby. I was terrified when I found out I was pregnant. It was a REAL struggle. And God blessed me beyond anything I could have imagined. I didn't CARE how he came into this world, only that he came safely. But God is in the business of extravagant grace and the VBAC he allowed me to have was more than I could have asked for.

This guy. He has my heart. He is sweet and crazy, and WILD. I love him fiercely. But I know e is seriously going to give me a run for my money. He just is non-stop crazy. I can't wait to see how he lives up to his name: Shepherd Justin. I pray he tends to God's flock. He is just and cares about injustice done to the rest of God's people. I just love him. so. very. much.