Life of a Premie momma

Lately I have been looking back on pictures of Inara when she was SO tiny. It is hard to believe sometimes. Thinking back It is hard to believe I survived on such little sleep. I was thinking about how my day looked when she first cam home. It was the same thing every 3 hours:

8:00am-Feed Inara
8:30am-Hold her upright so she doesn't puke everywhere
9:00am Inara in bouncy seat; I pump
9:30am- Inara and mommy nap until it starts over again at 11:00am

We repeated that all day. I would often "sleep" all day. At night I still had to hold her upright so she could digest and still had to pump. So consistently, I only got about 1.5 hours of sleep at a time. I remember feeling bad because I felt like I slept all day, but Justin was so gracious to remind me that while I did spend lots of little time sleeping, it barely added up. On top of all that I was TRYING to nurse 2x a day. It doesn't seem like a lot, but let me tell you....IT IS! Basically I would have to TRY to nurse for 1/2 hour, finish feeding with bottle, hold up right, and then pump after all that. Needless to say I was tired and the house was a wreck.

I remember wondering what new moms did everyday when they came home from the hospital with their babe. I mean don't new babies just sleep all day anyway. Now I know. In nursing school we learned to teach new moms to allow their body to rest too. "When baby sleeps, mom sleeps too". I was thankful for a hubby who enforced this rule (not that I needed anyone to TELL me to go to sleep). Luckily when Inara came home, she wasn't on monitors t o watch her breathing or heart, she could eat all her food from a bottle (and not a tube), and no medicine. A LOT of premie babes come home with a whole host of things to do on top of normal baby stuff. Often by the time the whole cycle is over, its time to start again with the next feeding. Attention blog world: having a premie baby at home is NOT like having a term baby. This is NOT to mean that mamma's of term babies don't work hard (because I have seen 1st hand that they do!), only that premie parents have different difficulties that other may not know about.  Often they have MULTIPLE disciplines to follow up with. Inara had her first appointment only 1 day after discharge and then weekly for a little bit. I am thankful she did come home and came home healthy too.

I wouldn't trade my experience for a "normal" delivery and baby. (it  has taken me awhile to get here). I know it was in God's plan for us to endure the trials we did. With that came the joy of being obedient in the midst of pain and experiencing the love of Christ through our church.

Here are some old pics of her

1st time with dad, our little burrito!

1st time I saw her face without tubes!

Coming home!

SO TINY!

8 months old, and such a little cutie!